As we go into 2016, we take the time to reflect on the last year and make a bunch of promises we will never keep. Maybe you’re going to lose that extra 10, 15 or 65 lbs you have been carrying. Maybe you’re going to get out more, but don’t know how because Ashley Madison has been shut down. Maybe you want to stop beating it like it stole something when you’re alone or in a car at a red light. These are your basic human resolutions we make at New Year’s and poker players are no different.

Let’s look at the resolutions the players should make for 2016

 

• Mike L – making sure there is enough rye and bad beats available for every game he plays
• Jeff T – making sure that he keeps proving he’s the favourite son as he takes chips off his brother
• Chris D – making sure he has Dan T to chip dump to him every game to keep the “no curse” streak alive
• Mark – making sure that he is unable to see the cards before 1^st break
• Pete W – making sure he hosts every tourney as can play ping pong all night
• Chris B – making sure he calls big raises with his pocket 4’s with 5 over cards on the board
• Jay P – making sure to keep trying to soul read each players move on each hand (even when not playing)
• Kyle R: making sure he calls bullshit on each play that works against him
• Phil E: making sure he just misses the final table so that he can keep his dealing skills in check
• Bobby H: making sure that break time is questioned every 5 to 7 min (even during break)
• Dan L: making sure that he brings enough tequila for the cash games
• Darren P: making sure he reminds people why he was picked after players not at the draft
• Kevin M: making sure that time doesn’t matter on calling hands especially when people think he folded
• Danny R: making sure he tries to get ryetarded early in the game and then wonder where his chips went
• Bryan S: making sure he keeps being liberal with his chips when there a perceived 50/50 chance
• Dan T: making sure he keeps reading Poker for Dummies and brings his card shuffler to each game
• Sean M: making sure he forgets that he runs the website and twitter account after he gets knocked out early
• Jeff F: making sure he reuses the same jokes over and over again as he slowly blinds out
• Darryl T: making sure that he keep bluffs by calling his brother on huge pots
• Gaige: makes sure he tries to keep up with Mike on the Rye as he walks into the final table

 

2016 looks to be a great year in the poker world with many laughs and stories on what could have been if you had the right cards or if the other player didn’t “suck out”.

 

So here are a few predictions in the 2016 half of the season

• Jeff F will win a tourney
• Kevin M will not be a taxi for the family and will turn on all the lights during earth hour (his wife will not be home at this time though and he will quickly turn them off before she gets home)
• Danny will miss a final table in the next 3 tourneys and Kyle will go on an explicit filled rant about him being a huge disappointment (not only as a family member but as his first overall pick)
• Chris D will continue to have a great season… hear that Chris D… YOU’RE HAVING A GREAT SEASON!!!